Thursday, February 05, 2009
saw this article about date violence on Today on 4 Feb. now i realised
i've been
thru some signs of those in my last r/s. although not physically, but its enuf to hurt. really, i didn't know it was a kind of violence until i read the article. glad that
i'm away from that f**king asshole now. However the after-effects are those memories kept coming back to me irregardless of wad
i'm doing. i hate this but is there anyone there who can help me?
Extracted from http://chooselovenotabuse.com/ :Dating violence happens when a partner uses force or pressure to abuse the other partner in a dating relationship.
There are mainly four forms of abuse:
1. Emotional
2. Psychological
3. Sexual
4. Physical
The frequency and the severity of the abuse usually increase as the relationship continues. When ignored, dating violence in romantic relationships often leads to domestic violence and even spousal abuse in marital relationships. Many are unknowing victims of dating violence. Often, victims are trapped in a tangled web of abuse because they are unaware of the symptoms of dating violence or lack the courage to walk away from an abusive relationship. No one deserves to be a victim of dating violence.
Spot the tell-tale signs early and seek help.
Emotional Abuse
- You are afraid of your partner
- You were subject to public humiliation by your date
Psychological Abuse
- Your partner threatens to use violence against you
- You want a breakup, but your partner threatens to commit suicide
Sexual Abuse
- You are forced to have sex with your partner, even when you told him/ her that you felt uncomfortable
- Your partner is only concerned with fulfilling his/her own sexual needs every time you are out on a date.
Physical Abuse
- Your partner pushed, punched, kicked or hurled things at you
- Your partner intentionally tried to inflict harm or injury
Controlling behaviour
- You are not allowed to meet friends or family without your partner’s consent
- Your partner insists on knowing where and what you are doing all the time
- You partner is overly suspicious of you and dictates your every move
Anyone could be a victim of Dating Violence.
It is important to identify tell-tale signs early, seek help and walk away from an abusive relationship.
Should you find yourself in an abusive relationship,
- Confide in friends and family, or seek help with counselors
- Do not meet your partner alone in secluded places
- Remember that you deserve betterHow true is this. 'Remember that you deserve better' People especially gals don't see this when they're in the violence r/s. Friends or even family tells them off, asking them to end the r/s, they just don't listen.
Why?
Maybe as the saying goes, love is blind. or 旁观者清 当局者迷.
Thinking that time will change everything to the better. but 99.999% of the time this doesn't work. they will go thru the cycle or violence--> abuse-->partnet apologising profusely & showering with loads or care and concern over and over again.
when shower with love, sweet talking will trick the victims will fall into the same old trap again and again.
To Gals :
however much you love your partner, pls remember that nobody has the right to treat you badly. No matter physically or mentally. you need to help urself otherwise noone can help you